Hi! I'm Clay. I'm a blogger, podcaster, and narrative alchemist working at the intersections of narrative alchemy, imaginal psychology, chaos magic, self-development, self-authorship, meaning-making, and conscious living. I believe stories are code, which makes reality programmable. Don't like your current reality? Fine! Rewrite the code. Change your life.
The Soulcruzer podcast…narrative alchemy in audio form. Call it an audioblog, call it threshold work, call it confessional mysticism.
One day I’m working through tarot as spiritual technology. The next, I’m exploring Nietzsche’s eternal return as lived practice, chaos magick techniques, or games as containers for transformation. Depth psychology meets the esoteric. Ancient wisdom meets the AI age. Theory becomes practice.
This is what narrative alchemy sounds like from the inside: raw, real, unpolished. Experiments in treating stories as code and consciousness as hackable.
If you’re here for the deep work and the edges, subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.
What Are We Becoming?
bySoulcruzer
This one started with me sitting down in the studio and noticing a pattern that’s been floating around the last couple of days. Everywhere I turn, people are talking about where we’re going as human beings, what we’re becoming, and how all this change is messing with our sense of place. AI is in the background of that conversation, obviously, but this episode isn’t me doing an “AI episode” as such. It’s more me circling the deeper question behind the noise.
Over the past 48 hours I’ve been listening to and watching a bunch of stuff, and it’s all orbiting the same gravitational pull. Humans feel displaced. Not just “the job market is weird” displaced, but identity displaced. Like: if the world changes this fast, what happens to the version of me that was built for the old world?
This all hit extra hard because I’ve been recovering from a tooth that’s been giving me grief for a year. It got infected again, they finally pulled it, and last night I was in that familiar post-dentist zone where the numbness wears off and the universe feels personally offensive. I was curled up on the couch, cycling between old Game of Thrones episodes and YouTube.
That’s when I landed on Sinead Bovell’s show (on YouTube, even though we call everything a podcast now). The show is called I’ve Got Questions, and she had an episode featuring Alexander Manu titled something like “Once in a Lifetime Career Reset is Coming.” That title alone just grabs you by the collar. Because that’s the vibe, isn’t it? A mass career and identity reset. Not gradual. Not polite. A reset.
And it brought me back to the question I’ve had from the start: What are we becoming? We can’t stay the same. So what’s the next iteration?
One of the things I’ve been chewing on is how most people’s first move with AI has been to retrofit it into the current paradigm. Same game, faster tools. Write quicker. Create quicker. Code quicker. Spreadsheet quicker. Become “10x productive,” “100x productive,” whatever. And I’m finding myself more and more allergic to that productivity obsession. Because why are we racing? Do we actually want to do more and more, or do we want to live better?
I noticed something about my own choices here too. My day job includes corporate training. The obvious play would be to jump on the trend and become “the AI guy,” training companies how to use AI. But I deliberately didn’t go that route. I wanted to be a practitioner. I wanted to push into the frontier and ask: not “how do I do the old thing faster?” but “what’s the new thing that wasn’t possible before?”
I used painting as a metaphor for this, because we’ve seen this cycle a thousand times. People painted on cave walls, then on canvas. Then the camera came along and painters freaked out. “That’s not art.” Then photography becomes its own art form, because real artists don’t just defend old tools. They explore new ones and invent new forms.
That’s where I think we are now. There’s resistance because people are having an existential crisis about identity, livelihood, meaning, and the role of humans. But there’s also that other camp: the folks who see a new tool and think, “Okay… what can we make now that we couldn’t make before?”
One of Manu’s points that really landed for me is that these tools could create the space for us to be more human, not less. If machines can handle repeatable, mundane stuff better, that should free us to focus on the parts of life that require presence, depth, relationship, contemplation. The being, not just the doing. That line hit me right where I live.
From there, my brain hopped tracks into Robert Anton Wilson territory, because I’ve just started reading Chapel Perilous, the biography of RAW. And it’s lighting my mind up. Reading about his thought processes reminds me what excites me most: consciousness, reality, philosophy of mind, and the question of what humans even are.
That’s what led me into this weird but wonderful blend I started playing with: Buddhism and anarchism. RAW had both currents running through him, and I found myself asking: how can those two coexist?
Here’s what clicked for me. Buddhism, at least in one of its core teachings, points at non-self (anatta). No independent permanent self. The “I” we cling to is more like a process, a pattern, a swirl of causes and conditions. Meanwhile anarchism, at its philosophical core, questions fixed rulers and permanent authority. No fixed ruler. No default assumption that someone must be in charge.
So one becomes an inner liberation practice, the other becomes an outer liberation practice. Inner freedom from attachment to the constructed self. Outer freedom from attachment to constructed authority. Same song in two octaves.
And then I went off, as I do, on the conditioning theme. Because this is the part that keeps bothering me in the best way. I was walking through town yesterday paying attention to my own reactions as I moved through the world, and I kept thinking: how much of my day-to-day behaviour is just conditioning? Automatic reactions. Scripted responses. Learned reflexes. Not conscious choice.
Try this: pick any belief you hold and trace it back. Where did it come from? Family? School? Culture? Religion? Government? Trauma? A moment you never questioned? We’re “programmed” from the start, and most of it we never opted into. And the self we think is “me” is often a patchwork of inherited code.
Then you flip it outward again to politics, law, power. Left, right, centre, everybody’s got an agenda. And the law often seems to apply differently depending on how much power you have. That’s the thing that makes me itch. I don’t trust big systems that claim they’re acting in your best interest while quietly feeding a power structure.
I’ll say this clearly: I stop short of the “burn it all down” impulse. My instinct is more “reduce it to the bare minimum.” Voluntary cooperation. Mutual aid. Less coercion. More sovereignty.
That word became the real anchor of the episode: sovereignty.
Because here’s the tricky part of this sci-fi world we’re living in. We’re already soft cyborgs. Look at how entwined we are with phones, watches, laptops, earbuds, glasses. Put them all in a drawer and turn them off and most of us can’t really function in the modern world the same way. I even talk about my “metaglasses” as this extension of perception, a way to connect to the hive mind, the collective intelligence, whatever you want to call it. And with AR coming, that overlay of digital on physical is going to make the cyborgness even more literal. You’ll be walking down the street in two worlds at once.
I actually like being a soft cyborg. I’m not anti-tech. I’m not anti-AI. I’m pro-consciousness.
Because the danger, or at least the risk, is that conditioning becomes exponential. Influence becomes subtle. Systems compete for your attention, your beliefs, your emotions, your identity. Governments, advertisers, religions, corporations, platforms. Everybody wants a piece of your psyche. They want to shape what you think, what you fear, what you desire, what you believe is true.
So my challenge, to myself and anyone listening, is: don’t abdicate your humanity. Don’t abdicate your sovereignty. Think for yourself. Question things. Ask what the hidden agenda is. Ask who …
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Narrative Alchemy
Narrative Alchemy is the practice of treating stories as spiritual technology—seeing inherited scripts clearly, releasing what isn't yours, and consciously authoring new myths to live by.
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Codex Incantation
What was written can be rewritten. What was fixed can be freed. You hold the pen. Write.
Ashkara, the Laughing Root
[Sigil] Guardian daemon of thresholds and transformation. Works whether you see it as archetypal force or powerful metaphor. →Explore the sigil
SITE NOTES:As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases, so if you see an Amazon link it’s more than likely an affiliate link. The price will be the exact same for you, but I get a commission.
Let’s set the scene: it’s 1959, and a strange, jagged book called Naked Lunch is carving up the American literary landscape like a junk-sick surgeon. The author? William S. Burroughs—a man who never fit the mould, and never wanted to. Burroughs, a Harvard-educated son of a wealthy family who favoured back-alley dealers over dinner parties, traversed life as a haunted flâneur, a rogue archivist of the human psyche, and an agent of chaos, documenting the soul’s descent into addiction, paranoia, and control.
To understand Burroughs is to take a long walk down a dark alley where literature, drugs, magick, and Cold War paranoia bleed into one another. He’s not just a writer—he’s a one-man mythos, equal parts Mephistopheles, cyberpunk oracle, and shadow-shaman of postmodernism.
Early Life: The Making of a Madman Mystic
Born in St. Louis, Missouri, in 1914, William Seward Burroughs came from money. His grandfather invented the adding machine. But young Burroughs was never meant to carry the family name in the polite sense. From an early age, he was drawn to the margins—fascinated by outlaws, guns, and forbidden desires. A sensitive and sharply intelligent boy, he found solace in books, mythology, and the occult. He read Spengler, Crowley, and pulp fiction with equal reverence.
He studied English at Harvard, dabbled in medicine in Vienna, and ultimately failed to find any conventional path that could contain his restless spirit. His sexual identity—as a gay man in a time of harsh repression—further exiled him from the world of clean-cut careers and white-picket respectability.
But Burroughs didn’t want a career. He wanted truth—however dark, diseased, or deranged it might be. And he believed the truth was to be found in altered states, criminal underworlds, and the raw edges of language.
The Beats, the Bullet, and the Book
In the 1940s and 50s, Burroughs linked up with a ragtag crew of seekers and madmen—Allen Ginsberg, Jack Kerouac, and Gregory Corso—the so-called Beat Generation. He was the elder statesman of the group, the one who’d actually done all the things the others only wrote about. Junk, hustlers, Mexico City dives, and back-alley hallucinations—Burroughs was the real deal.
But his life took a mythic turn in 1951 when, during a drunken night in Mexico, he shot and killed his wife, Joan Vollmer, in a botched “William Tell” stunt. He later called this moment the event that set him on the path to becoming a writer. It was as if some daimon had to be released through bloodshed—an ancestral curse turned literary destiny.
Naked Lunch and the Cut-Up Revolution
What followed was Naked Lunch (1959)—a book that exploded the novel as a form. Part hallucination, part political screed, part horror show, the text dances between vignettes of drug addiction, grotesque sexuality, interdimensional control systems, and Kafkaesque bureaucracy. It was banned for obscenity, championed by Ginsberg, and eventually canonised as a major postmodern work.
But Burroughs wasn’t finished with form. In collaboration with British artist and fellow mystic Brion Gysin, he began experimenting with the cut-up technique—a literal slicing and rearranging of texts to disrupt linear thought and expose the hidden architecture of language. Inspired by Dada, Surrealism, and the I Ching, Burroughs believed this method could break the control mechanisms embedded in language itself.
For Burroughs, writing wasn’t just art—it was magickal warfare.
The Magus of Control
As his work deepened, Burroughs evolved into something stranger: a fusion of rogue scientist and urban shaman. His books became psychic maps of resistance—The Soft Machine, Nova Express, and The Ticket That Exploded—each more surreal and conspiratorial than the last. In these texts, humanity is under attack by alien forces of control, and the only weapon is language itself.
Burroughs’ worldview is a heady blend of Gnosticism, cyberpunk, junkie wisdom, and paranoid prophecy. He warned us of viral media, AI control systems, and psychic colonisation long before these ideas hit the mainstream.
He also dabbled in chaos magick, practised sigil work, and saw writing as a ritual act. One could say he was the first true technomancer—a mythic figure bridging language, mind, and machine.
Late Life & Legacy: The Godfather of Punk and Cyberpunk
In his later years, Burroughs became an unlikely countercultural icon. He collaborated with Laurie Anderson, Kurt Cobain, and Tom Waits. His skeletal visage—always with a fedora and deadpan voice—haunted music videos and underground art galleries alike.
He died in 1997 in Lawrence, Kansas, a place he chose for its flatness, silence, and simplicity. His final journal entry read, “Love? What is it? Most natural painkiller what there is.”
Even in death, Burroughs left behind a sigil, a code, a whisper to those of us still decoding the dream.
Why Burroughs Still Matters
To read Burroughs is to stare into a cracked mirror and see the control systems flickering behind your reflection. He matters because he didn’t write to soothe or seduce—he wrote to disrupt. He’s the arch-trickster of American letters, the literary equivalent of a virus engineered to crash the system.
If Ginsberg howled and Kerouac wandered, Burroughs interrogated—the machine, the word, the self.
In a time where algorithmic language threatens to replace thought, Burroughs reminds us that words are weapons—and the first war is always for the mind.
He was not here to comfort us. He was here to wake us up.
In mythic praxis, we look not at what a life story says literally but at how it resonates symbolically—how it serves as a script for the soul’s own unfolding.
Burroughs wasn’t just “a writer on drugs.” He was a modern-day Orpheus, descending into the underworld not to retrieve Eurydice but to retrieve the shattered pieces of his own self—dragged through addiction, trauma, and altered states. His journey maps a dark yet essential dimension of the mythic path: the descent into chaos to uncover hidden power.
So let’s unpack this post, not as a literary review, but as an invitation to inner myth-making.
🔮 PROMPTS FOR MYTHIC REFLECTION
Here are some prompts to explore this through your mythic self. Think of each as a portal—pull a chair up to the digital campfire, open your journal, and see what emerges.
✧ The Daimon in the Bullet
“He later called this moment the event that set him on the path to becoming a writer.”
Burroughs killed his wife Joan in a surreal tragedy that he mythologised as a necessary horror—a blood sacrifice that called forth his daimon.
Prompt:
What “wound” or irreversible event in your life marked the beginning of your mythic path? What daemon might have been released through that rupture? If your wound had a voice, what would it write?
✧ Cutting Up the Control System
“He believed this method could break the control mechanisms embedded in language itself.”
The cut-up technique wasn’t just literary trickery—it was chaos magick with scissors. Burroughs saw language as a virus, a system of control. To cut it was to free the psyche.
Prompt:
What words, labels, or phrases have been used to define you—by others or by yourself? What happens when you “cut up” those words and rearrange them into a new spell, a new self? What would your anti-language sound like?
Bonus activity: try a literal cut-up. Take a paragraph from your journal or bio and slice it up. Rearrange the fragments. What unexpected truths emerge?
✧ The Outlaw as Archetype
“Burroughs wandered through life like a haunted flâneur…an agent of chaos documenting the soul’s descent.”
He is a modern-day Trickster-Shaman. He walks outside society not out of rebellion alone, but because that’s where the real data is.
Prompt:
In what ways are you an outlaw of the soul? What parts of yourself live on the margins, in the alleyways of your identity? What sacred knowledge have you gathered from being “outside the system”?
✧ Technomancer Rites
“One could say he was the first true technomancer—a mythic figure bridging language, mind, and machine.”
Burroughs prefigured the future—cyberpunk, AI, media viruses. He wrote of word demons and machine sorcery long before we spoke of algorithms or neural nets.
Prompt:
How do you use technology as part of your mythic path? What digital rituals, artefacts, or symbols are part of your praxis? What spells are you casting when you write, code, or post?
✧ The Mythopoetic Death
“His final journal entry read, ‘Love? What is it? Most natural painkiller what there is.’”
Even at the end, Burroughs didn’t resolve his myth—he whispered it forward.
Prompt:
If your life ended today, what myth would you leave behind? What line, what fragment, what glyph would carry your signature into the void? What would the final incantation of your mythic self be?
🜃 ALCHEMICAL SYNTHESIS
Burroughs is a mythic archetype for the Shadow Magician—the one who doesn’t fear the grotesque, the diseased, or the obscene because he sees the sacred hiding inside it. He walks with demons not to become one but to understand their methods.
As you engage your own mythic praxis, ask:
Where am I being called to descend?
What rituals can I create to cut through illusion?
What is the ‘language virus’ I’ve inherited—and how do I rewrite it?
Your own life might not be as extreme or tragic, but the structures of myth are always there. Burroughs shows us that myth isn’t just ancient—it’s encoded in the modern, the digital, the punk, the paranoid.
🜂 THE CALL
If myth is the soul’s symbolic autobiography, then this post is a mirror—cracked, jagged, luminous. It reflects your potential to not just tell your story, but ritually re-author it. In the lineage of Burroughs, the question becomes:
What myth are you writing with your life, your wounds, your digital traces?
Now go—cut, remix, bleed ink. Let your daimon speak.
I had heard of William Burrows but only as a name. It was good to listen (Siri has really improved ) to a brief of his life story and when I get a little time I will copy and paste some of my daily notes into the cut machine.
Another though provoking post as I sit here alone in a down trodden area of Munich.